When asked in a recent interview about the state of Mexico's tourism economy, Minister of Travel and Tourism, Juan Jose Xtapa Maria Cordova Snoticus Venezuela Home Depotita Tegucigulpa Gonzales opined "Mexico is a fine, fine place to visit. I feel safe anywhere in this beautiful country."
Although his use of a Class I Haz-Mat suit, a peasant from the hill country hired to constantly hose him down with Purel, his insistence that no reporter get within 25 feet from him and then speak to him only through an alcohol soaked cheese cloth, and his security detail composed of 63 mercenaries from Blackwell, two fully armed Apache gunships on loan from the Alabama Air National Guard, six bullet proof, heavily armored SUV's, a World War II vintage Russian T-72 tank, and the three steamer trunks full of bribe money, err I mean incentive funds, that two aides were busy passing out fist over fist to local hostiles might call the sincerity of his comments into question.
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